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hot topics
Keeping Kids Safe Online
Internet safety is a growing concern for
parents, schools and communities
At one time, the Internet might have seemed like
an innocent and fun place for kids to visit. But
as stories have spread across the media about
cyber-bullying, online predators and identity
theft, parents are learning they must be more
alert.Unfortunately, it has taken tragedies like the
2006 suicide of a St. Louis-area teen to alert
people that being on the Internet isn’t just fun
and games.
In an effort to address growing concerns, BJC
School Outreach and Youth Development is
teaching area parents, schools and communities
about Internet safety.
“Parents need to educate themselves and talk to
their children about the Internet,” says Lynne
Lang, BJC School Outreach and Youth Development
curriculum specialist. “They must help their
children understand what they’re doing and
develop rules for their family. Parents also
need to have consequences for misuse.”
Lang has been involved in developing educational
curriculums for area schools and communities
since 1999. Her background includes work on
emotional intelligence -- helping students gain
self-awareness, recognize emotions in others,
repair emotional damage and have a sense of
empathy -- as well as understanding the impact
of bullying behaviors.
She found that the communication skills
necessary in both of these areas could also help
keep kids safe in schools and their community.
Lang has been using these same concepts in her
work educating others about Internet safety
since 2003.
“I first started hearing from kids as young as
fourth grade that they were really struggling
with messages they received online that caused
them to be afraid,” she says.
Lang recalls a powerful moment for her. A young
girl at a local school told her of getting a
message from someone saying they were going to
kill her in seven days. The girl learned it was
a classmate who sent the message thinking he was
being funny. Once it was explained to the
classmate that this was scary because no one
could see his face or hear his voice, he
apologized.
Many BJC School Outreach staff members,
including Lang, are I-Safe America
presenters and use their training for
presentations to area schools and communities.
I-Safe America is a non-profit foundation
approved by the United States Congress dedicated
to protecting the online experiences of youth.
Lang and her colleagues advise parents about the
three “D’s” if they receive a bullying message
of some kind:
- Don’t delete the message
- Don’t respond to the message
- Do get help from law enforcement and print the
incoming message
- We remind parents and kids that as soon as they
respond to a negative message, they become part
of the bullying cycle,” Lang says. “Most
cyber-bullying starts with verbal bullying,
which is why we need to create a kinder climate
in our schools and everywhere. We have to keep
our eyes and ears open.”
Cyber-bullying can happen through instant
messaging, e-mail and social networking sites
like MySpace or FaceBook. “Children need to be
reminded that, once they’ve put something out
there in cyberspace, it’s not private and can’t
be taken back,” Lang says.
Other types of abuse are occurring on the
Internet. The national average of children who
meet a stranger online is 11 percent; in
Missouri that number is 14 percent.
One local community has become so concerned
about these issues that leaders created the
“Know More” about Internet Safety program. The
city of St. Peters, Missouri, kicked off its
program through a variety of resources,
including an internet safety public forum, where
Lang was part of an expert panel.
“Our communities are vital in protecting our
children. We have to help parents be the best
resources, and encourage parents to talk to
their children, be open to help them and solve
problems when they arise.”
What You Can Do:
- Monitor your child’s computer use; keep
computers with internet access in public areas
of your home, not in children’s bedrooms
- Talk to your child about your expectations,
and teach children to use the computer
responsibly
- Create a written agreement that you and your
child sign, and prepare to have consequences for
violations
- Learn the laws regarding threatening others on
the internet, and educate your child about your
findings
- Frequently check the sites your child is
visiting; Microsoft, maker of Internet Explorer,
explains how to
view your web page history
- Restrict the sites your child can visit
on the Internet; Microsoft explains how to
control access to web sites in
Internet Explorer
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